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Have you ever had one of those moments of inspiration where a particular suggestion got to the heart of the matter and just seemed to ‘click’ with your client? That’s the power of hypnotic language, and in this article, we’ll be exploring ten of the most effective - and sometimes unexpected - language patterns you can use.
Hypnotic Language
Whether you work from scripts or ‘off the cuff’, suggestion is at the heart of hypnotherapy, and you need to know the basics of hypnotic language. It’s probably obvious why this is true if you extemporise session content, but if you don’t, you still need to be able to tell a well-written script from a poor one. And, of course, you can use these language patterns when you are adapting other people’s scripts to your particular client.
Crafting effective suggestions is not about using mysterious or complicated words but about paying attention to how we say something as well as what we say: choosing words that gently bypass resistance and help change happen.
1. Direct and Indirect Suggestion
We’re going to include some lesser-known language patterns later on, but let’s start with the basics.
A direct suggestion is just as it sounds: relatively authoritative, straightforward, and it’s easy to understand what’s expected as a response. It is best used with clients who are very responsive or motivated, or who come from backgrounds where they are used to taking instruction from others. An example often given is ‘someone in the military’, though remember that higher-ranking individuals may be more used to giving orders than taking them.
An indirect suggestion is more subtle, permissive and indirect and was popularised by the work of Milton Erikson, who was famous not just for metaphors but also the use of skilful indirect suggestion. It suits clients who are very analytical or experiencing some resistance to change or secondary gain. Useful words to help you construct indirect suggestions are may, might, perhaps, notice, wonder, and phrases like ‘many people find…’
An easy way to remember the difference is that direct suggestions are a request or instruction, whilst indirect suggestions are more like a hint. For example:
- You feel calm and relaxed.
- You may start to notice how very easy it is to relax.
2. Double Binds
A double bind is a suggestion that appears to offer the client a choice of actions, although whichever one they choose will take them towards their goal. It’s particularly useful for undermining resistance or avoiding ‘pushing the rebel button’ in clients who value their freedom of choice. For example:
- Would you prefer to feel more relaxed now, or in a few minutes?
- You may simply fail to notice other smokers, or perhaps you do notice them and feel a surge of pride that you are no longer trapped by addiction as they are.
3. Embedded Commands
A good option for clients who struggle with control issues are embedded commands; essentially, a direct suggestion hidden inside an indirect one. It’s entirely controlled by your tone of voice which changes subtly as you get to the direct section.
For example, here’s a direct suggestion.
You relax more with each breath out.
Now look at this indirect version.
You can enjoy wondering whether you relax more with each breath out or each breath in.
You should see that the first is embedded inside the second. You could use the second one as a permissive, indirect suggestion by using the same tone of voice throughout. Or you could use the embedded direct command by taking a very tiny pause before and after it, and adding subtle emphasis to those few words.
- You can enjoy wondering whether [pause] you relax more with each breath out [pause] or each breath in.
Try saying it aloud both ways.
4. Tag Questions
You might not realise that you can use questions as suggestions, but it can be an effective way of setting the client off on a relevant train of thought. Sometimes clients will answer out loud, but unless you specifically invite them to, most adults treat these as rhetorical and respond internally. In my experience, children - if you work with them - are more likely to answer aloud. For example:
- If you follow my instructions, you will go into a comfortable trance, and you know that you can follow instructions, don’t you?
5. Yes Sets, Pacing and Leading
Following on from tag questions are yes sets, also sometimes called pacing and leading. Essentially, you ask a series of questions or make a series of statements that you know will get agreement from the client because they are undeniably true. Then you lead into your suggestion, and they tend to agree again. For example:
- You’re sitting in that chair ... with your eyes closed ... listening to my words ... and beginning to feel more relaxed already.
You can also use no sets if you want the client to reject an idea. For example:
- Do you want to continue to shorten your life by eleven minutes with each cigarette?
Do you want to continue literally watching your money go up in smoke?
Or letting your smoking habit control your life?
Of course not, which is why you have chosen today to become a non-smoker.
6. Conversational Postulates
Yet another way of using questions, this refers to a question that sounds as if it should get a literal answer, but, in fact, acts as a suggestion. Think of it as a broad hint, phrased as a question. In everyday life, we use these to elicit action when we don’t want to give a direct command, perhaps because we want to sound polite or friendly. Imagine your boss says to you, ‘Could you make me a coffee?’. You’ll recognise this as a closed question, and the literal answer would be yes or no. But you’re more likely to respond by putting the kettle on! In this example, the client is more likely to try out imagining than to simply respond with a yes or no:
- Can you imagine feeling calm and secure?
7. Confusional language
This is another Eriksonian favourite, using puns, twists and turns, double meanings and complex grammar to disrupt logical or analytical thinking. In other words, while the logical conscious mind is busy trying to work out the meaning of what you’re saying, the suggestion bypasses the critical faculty and enters the unconscious mind. As the unconscious processes information much faster than the conscious, it has no trouble working out the message. Having said that, it can be challenging for some clients to be faced with large passages of confusional language, as they are not sure what’s expected of them, so it’s best used sparingly. For example:
- Sometimes it’s confusing to think about how you’ll begin not to wonder when you’ll forget to remember that you’re relaxing.
(Worked it out? You don’t need to wonder when you’ll forget that you’re relaxing.)
8. Negation Confusion
Whereas confusional language uses complex word patterns to distract the conscious mind, negation confusion uses paradox - apparently negative statements that make positive points. This often uses double negatives. For example, think of an everyday (though grammatically incorrect) phrase like, ‘I don’t have no money’. Although you are intended to understand that the person is penniless, taken literally, it means the opposite. (If no money is what they don’t have, they must have some.) In therapy, you can use this pattern to undermine resistance, and this example is for a client who states they are unable to relax:
- There's no pressure here to relax. Although it’s not impossible that you’re already relaxing in ways you haven’t noticed.
9. Utilisation Language
Essentially, this refers to using what’s happening around you in your suggestions or to deepen the client’s trance. It’s a good technique for when the environment is not as calm and quiet as you’d like, perhaps when roadworks disrupt your normally peaceful therapy room. For example:
- You might be aware of the sounds of everyday life going on around you, and that's fine. Every sound simply reminds you that this is time you have set aside for yourself, and that you can drift deeper with each awareness.
Utilisation language often combines well with double binds. For example:
- And as you go even deeper into trance, you may find that you prefer to allow my voice to fade into the background of your awareness ... your conscious mind drifting and dreaming, and only your unconscious mind aware of the words that I’m using ... and the meaning of those words. Or perhaps your conscious mind remains curious enough to listen carefully before it begins to drift and dream.
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10. Linking Ideas
By creating a relationship between what you know is happening and what you want to happen, you create a powerful suggestion that what you want to happen is inevitable. Eye fixation inductions work like this – we talk about the fixation object going out of focus and the eyes wanting to close because we know that this happens when we look at something for long enough. Then we link those effects to going into trance, which is what we want to happen, and it does. Other examples would be:
Cause and Effect - The more you notice your breathing, the deeper you go into trance.
Implied Relationships – As you begin to focus on your breathing, you may notice it’s easier to feel just a little more in control.
Conversational Loops – starting a story or suggestion, then going off at a tangent before returning to the original idea. If you remember the Two Ronnies on TV, or have seen the repeats, think Ronnie Corbett's armchair story-telling. (If not, go and look them up on YouTube, they are worth watching.)
This example takes the client from wondering to noticing to realising to wondering again.
- Some people wonder how they’ll know when they’ve started to relax... and as they think about that, they might notice their breathing slowing... which is often what happens just before someone realises they’ve already started to relax... and you might find yourself wondering how you’ll notice that happening again next time.
Tips on Using Hypnotic Language and Suggestion
These language patterns can be very powerful, and you’ll hear them used in sales patter, political speeches, and advertising, to name just a few examples. Listen out for them and see if you can decide whether they are being used in the best interests of the speaker or the listener.
In therapy, of course, the answer should always be the listener. Just remember:
- It's best to practise one pattern at a time, get confident with it before trying another.
- Practice in everyday conversation, as well as with clients in and out of trance.
- Use the patterns ethically, and with the recipient's welfare, dignity, and preferences in mind: this is especially important if you are trying this out in everyday life (even for simple things, like asking your partner to make you a cup of tea).
- Keep things client-focused. Include the client’s language, phrases and words as much as you can. Many studies have shown that rapport is more important than technique in getting results.
A Final Word
Don’t try to use all the patterns in every session. Not only will that be exhausting, but no approach is right for every client. But knowing the techniques will help you to become more flexible, responsive and creative in your therapy sessions.
Now, choose one or two of these techniques to practice this week and let me know how it goes.
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References
Bandler, Richard & Grinder, John. (1975) Patterns of the Hypnotic Techniques of Milton H. Erickson, M.D. Meta Publications.
Bandler, R., & Grinder, J. (1981). Trance-Formations: Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the Structure of Hypnosis. Real People Press.
Lankton, S., & Lankton, C. (2008/1983). The answer within: A clinical framework of Ericksonian hypnotherapy. Williston, VT: Crown House Publications
Niels Ammerlaan (2024). NLP Conversational Postulates. [online] Mind Tools - Tools for your Mind. Available at: https://www.mindtools.co.th/personal-development/neuro-linguistic-programming/nlp-conversational-postulates/.
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Author: Debbie Waller is an experienced hypnotherapist and hypnotherapy trainer. She is the author of Anxiety to Calm: a Practical Guide to a Laid-Back Life, The Hypnotherapist's Companion, Their Worlds, Your Words, and The Metaphor Toolbox, all available from Amazon or direct from the author. Find out more about Debbie's services on
Yorkshire Hypnotherapy Training - multi-accredited hypnotherapy practitioner training, taster days and foundation levels.
CPD Expert - accredited CPD and other therapy training (online and workshops options), expert and qualified hypnotherapy supervision
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